Absalom, the Son Who Tore His Family Apart by Jeff Winters

Jeff Winters steps in to write this excellent article

Maybe one of the best known figures found in the Old Testament is king David. From a youth, David was one after God’s own heart. He slayed Goliath when this giant spoke against God and the Army of Israel. We also learned of David’s down fall in sin with Bathsheba. But it may be that we never learned much about David’s sons.

God’s Introduction

In 2nd Samuel chapter 3, in the first 3 verses, we learn that David had 3 sons born to him. David’s  firstborn was Amnon by his wife Ahinoam. The second son was Chileab, by Abigail the widow of Nabal. The third son was Absalom, the son of Maacah, the daughter of Talmai, king of Geshur (2Samuel 3:1-3). No doubt that David was proud to have sons born to him.

Absalom we are told in scripture was a very handsome man (2Samuel 14:25). We are told that there was not one physical blemish on him. Also, we are told that there was not one person in Israel who was praised more than Absalom (2Samuel 14:25). Not to be outdone by Absalom’s manly beauty, Absalom had beautiful hair. It was only cut once a year (2Samuel 14:26).

Absalom’s Identification

Absalom did not have a physical blemish, but he did have a fault that caused a split and problems in David’s family. David had a daughter, Tamar. Tamar’s mother was the same mother of Absalom. Scripture teaches us that Tamar was very beautiful as well. Tamar was the focus of Amnon attention, David’s oldest son. Amnon violated Tamar due to his lustful desire for her (2Samuel 13:1-20). Because of Amon’s lust for his half-sister and his forceful attack upon her, Absalom sought to kill his half-brother Amnon for the wrong that he had done to his sister (2Samuel 13:2-29). Absalom killed his half-brother for what he did to his sister. David grieved for his son and Absalom fled from his family to Geshur (2Samuel 13:37-38). Anytime a parent loses a child there is going to be grieving. David felt this grief and he wept every day for his son.

Absalom fled Jerusalem and after 3 years, David allowed Absalom to return to Jerusalem (2Samuel 14:1-24). But this act of kindness of a father to his son did not come with gratitude. Instead, Absalom conspired against David his father to overthrow the kingdom (2Samuel chapter 15-17). Absalom was able to conquer many of the hearts of the people in Jerusalem and David had to flee Jerusalem (2Samuel 15:1-23).  Absalom did this by deceiving them (2Samuel 15:2-6).

Absalom’s death was a tragic one. Even after all that Absalom did to David, David commanded his servants not to hurt or kill his son Absalom (2Samuel 18:1-18). Joab was the oldest son of David’s sister Zeruiah. He was said to be revengeful and bold. He helped kill Absalom by thrusting 3 javelins into his heart when Absalom was caught up in a tree by his hair. We are told that ten of Joab’s servants assisted him in killing Absalom; “And ten young men, Joab's armor-bearers, surrounded Absalom and struck him and killed him (2Samuel 18:15).

The body of Absalom was taken from the tree where he was caught by his hair and threw him in a great pit and covered it with large stones (2Samuel 18:17). When the news came to David, he mourned for his son Absalom (2Samuel 18:31-33). In David’s words of grief, He said; “O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! Would I had died instead of you, O Absalom, my son, my son!” 

Our Impression

All of the grief that David experienced occurred because of sin. The death of Absalom came about because of the hate of Amon, and his self-desire to take over the throne. Again sin! In all the faults that Absalom had, he was still very dear to his father David.

Going down the road of sin will only deliver misery. Detour while we still can.

NOTE: Thank you to brother Winters for this excellent article!